Last night I decided to attend my first Submission Wrestling class in a long time. Being the savvy veteran I am, I decided to eat well in advance to allow digestion. I got in from work, and bunged a Tesco Finest Lasagne Al Forno in the oven. That’s right, I’m bold enough to have a lasagne before training. Gimp.
This is not a good fucking idea. Now I’m a big eater, and I’ve eaten some incredible amounts of shit before going to training (full English fry ups, for instance), but I can honestly say that lasagne was one of the worst. The portion was 700grams (1.5lbs) which I’m sure on the box says ‘Serves Two’ but this is Scotland, enough of your nonsense.
We worked a guard pass all night. With the pass came a very horrible pressure choke that made lasagne repeat on me every time we drilled it. I found that more uncomfortable than the choke and the guard pass (which twisted your spine gradually). I can’t be arsed describing the pass fully, but it’s the one where you basically have them in a powerbomb position. You hoist their hips up, grab under their back and use hip pressure/a sprawl to force them over.
Bear in mind, that wrestling lasagne is never a good idea. You will lose, it is too rich, too tasty and too heavy for your body to cope with whilst drilling moves. Have something light, like an omelette, you idiot.
This has been today’s friendly advice column on dieting in Jiu-Jitsu.